4/29/2005 10:36:00 AM

juz came back from outing wif my jc frenz... sometimes i wonder r they realli true frenz?? it seems like i'm not an impt person in the group... my birthday pass for quite sometime already n they have not given me anything... n they seem to haf forgotten abt it... not dat i'm gian peng abt the present... but i feel dat it shows dat they dun realli bother abt me.. isnt it?? haiz... den y shld i bother abt them??? juz like wat bb said... y do i even bother to be nice to them when they arent nice to me... i'm juz knockingmy head against the wall when i noe its painful to do dat.... haiz... watever lah.. i treat them as frenz.. coz they've been nice to me once n i will always remember dat.. they will still be my frenz no matter how they treat me....

recently jasc n harn has been toking abt being in a relationship juz becoz of fear to be lonely.... i think its quite true... but wats the pt of being in a relationship when all u needed was some1 to listen to u yet the person doesnt listen n instead say dat u r stupid??? it seems dat nobody treats me as nice as my parents treat me.. maybe dats becoz i'm a f*cked up person... dats y everybody is treating me so badly... n my parents got no choice coz they r the ones who brought me into this world... ha... maybe dat juz show wat a b*tch i was all along....

*everyone shall juz leave me alone n dun bother abt me*
how i wish i can leave this country forever n ever n not come back..... i shall look forward to my taiwan trip... its a getaway from everything here... i meant EVERYTHING!!!!

4/28/2005 09:13:00 AM

yea.. i'm going taiwan soon!!! n i've extended 2 more nitez there... wifout my parents!!! onli wif min!!!!!!! hahaha... its cool... coz i can buy watever i wan... hee... but i'm abit worried.. coz its onli the 2 of us there... but i'm sure we'll haf lots of fun n great shopping... hee... so cool.... yeah!! i realli cant wait for sat to come.. hee... but i will miss my bb like crazy... not gonna see him until the 8th which is the day i'm coming back... hee... i hope he miss me too... hahaha.... i'm so excited!!! hee... its been a long time since i get excited over a trip... hee.... i juz hope everything goes well when i'm all alon in a foreign country wifout any adults... ehhz... min not considered adult although she oredi over 21 le... hee....

hmm.. considering whether to change my blogskin now or after i come back from all my trips.. hee...

4/26/2005 08:30:00 AM

exams r officially over... yet i'm not feeling happy about it... coz i noe next sem will be more difficult to go thru... haiz... i hate uni... uni sux.... or rather i hate my life now..... y did i choose to go uni in the 1st place.... i shld haf juz gone to poly... haiz.... it sux.... the onli thing dats making me happier is my taiwan trip... haiz.... my life realli sux... i noe there r pple who r worse off than me.. but i juz hate my life now...

some side tots... does being in a relationship requires u to change urself to suit the other person??? i dun think so... i think dat love is abt accepting how the person is not trying to change him or her.... so y am i trying so hard to change myself??? dunno myself too... maybe i juz love him too much.... but i think i'm trying too hard... its hurting me.... y do pple try so hard but all they get is sadness??? i think i;m juz being the dumb stupid childish ger who believes in fantasy, romantic love......

i wanna be alone... i wanna cry.... =(